Super Week? Not So Far

I'm a little reluctant to write this because so far my performance hasn't been up to par. The legs are there, the mind is not.
Blue Island was fine, up until I went down. No big deal, at least not for me. Jorge's tire went flat into turn 2 with 3 laps to go. I was directly behind him when he washed out. He said I hit his body. I ended up falling and then sliding on top of his bicycle coming out of the wreck with only a scratch on my elbow, nothing else. As for Jorge and his bike that's another story.
Richton Park looked good from the start with us having 6 riders in the field. With a little pre planning we at least knew what to expect from each other. The race was a good enough tempo when I got on a breakaway with 4 other guys. We stayed away for 8 laps. I think we could have stayed out longer, but didn't work as good as we could have together. After the pack reeled us back in, Bob went out. 2 riders bridged up and me and Elvis blocked. I think me and Elvis gave Bob as effective of a block as 2 riders could muster but it didn't last. With 2 laps left I was willing to lead out Bob and Elvis for the finish having a good postion on a guy I marked at the begining of the race. Man did he have some nice lines around the turns. And there I was right behind him. At the start finish line with 1 left I see somebody go off the front which was inconcequential but then my marked man starts going off, so I followed. No sooner than I catch up to him, he sits up. So now my dilemma. Do I sit up or do I hammer for a lap. With me and my mentality, which on do you think I did? So I hammer it going around turn 1 and 2 all by myself. Coming out of turn 2 I touch my peddal on the ground which sends me wobbling into the grass. Thankfully I didn't go down. More importantly when I came back on the course, nobody caught up to me yet. If they did and I was to come back on, that would have been a catastrophy. Ther's me not thinking again. Needless to say, my momentum was gone and everybody passed me going into turn 3.
My next race was the short course in Milwakee. A 2.2 mile loop which is situated right on their lakefront, then up a 80 foot climb, by some beutifull houses and back down to a very long staright away. I was talking to some guys before the race on what casette to us seeing as how I had on my 11-23. One guy from Chicago said he's going to a 12-26, but a Milwakee guy said It was a big ring climb in your 21. I'm glad to say I changed to the 12-26. The hill was graduall but the 26 allowed me to stay in the bing ring the whole race. With all being said, I expended too much energy throughout the race. I have to restrain myself from pulling so much when nobody else wants to. All the attacks were quickly reeled back in. I know I had decent positioning but on the last lap at the top of the hill a little gap opened up and i wasn't in the front. Knowing that this was the last lap, and all the other breaks were nullified really fast I decided to conserve myself for the sprint and let somebody else reel them back in . Well, nobody was willing to chase them down so here I go again. It was a break of 8 and I never did catch up to them. All I did was lead out the remainder of the field coming in 14.
What did all this teach me so far? I'm still trying to figure it out.